Dear Activists,

I sympathize, I really do. I share many beliefs with you and I know you are just trying to make the world a better place, but I have to break it to ya: You’re doing it wrong!

Please consider the following before you go out and hurt our causes again:

1. Radicalizing the cause. This is the big one. If a mainstream audience cannot relate to you, you’re sunk. Waving signs and screaming scares people away. Don’t do it. Find common ground with the average person. Demonstrate that one can hold your belief and live a normal lifestyle, or, even better, that your belief helps one to thrive.
2. Holier-than-thou. Nobody likes to hear their wrong. Nobody likes to be preached to. Why on Earth do you think people will believe you if you have only negative things to say to them!? Think of the worst fire-and-brimstone preacher you have ever seen. Did he make you want to love Jesus and your neighbor? Prolly not. He prolly made you want to run away, switch the channel, or throw rocks. Preaching about veganism/feminism/*ism will produce similar results. Don’t do it. Instead, give practical, positive results. Don’t tell grisly slaughterhouse stories, talk about delicious vegan recipes. Discuss the practical, positive economic and health benefits: vegan food can be dirt cheap and super healthy!
3. Insisting upon absolutes. Do not condemn people for not going far enough. Encourage every bit of support you receive. If someone is vegetarian, do not eschew them for not being hardcore enough, congratulate them for giving up meat. This is a huge help to your cause. Chances are, if they’ve made a step in the right direction, they’re interested in taking a few more; give them guidance, but not pressure: a handrail is much more useful on a steep staircase than a push…
4. Persuasion by Pestering Not only does nobody like to hear they are wrong, they sure as hell don’t want to hear about it all day long. I was recently invited to participate in a movement in which proponents of a bill would flood a senator’s office for an entire day to raise his awareness of said bill. You know what I’d do if a group bothered me in my office all day? I would do everything possible to make sure they fail.  For the record, I am also a proponent of that bill, but I chose not to participate because I think it is hurting the cause! Write your senator a letter with reasonable arguments and pleas, for him to read at his leisure. Have a calm, reasonable discussion with your friends or roommates, in which you take time to listen to their questions, and answer them thoughtfully and truthfully, not with platitudes and slogans. If you irritate someone, they will not listen to you!!!
5. Being unrelatable I’ve mentioned this a bit already, but it deserves its own paragraph. If you are having a discussion with someone, trying to justify/convince them of your beliefs, make sure you choose an argument they can relate to. Once more, I’ll use the example of veganism: when talking to my engineer roommate I don’t talk about ideological points about animal welfare, I talk about practical concerns: it makes better sense, in terms of energy, to eat lower on the food chain. It costs a lot less, in terms of money, natural resources, and labour, to create plant-based food as opposed to animal-based food. These are the kinds of things that resonate with engineers. If you’re talking to a businessman about equality for women in the workplace, do it in terms of economics and profit. You’re not selling out by not mentioning your ideological beliefs, you are broadening your audience. We shouldn’t care why people agree with us, we care that they agree. There are many valid reasons for holding any given belief; appeal to the one most likely to hit home with your audience!

In short, don’t come on too heavy. Be approachable, be relatable, be courteous, practical, and friendly. Good luck, dear activists. I want a just, equitable world just as much as you do; please be reasonable about it so you don’t scare off the rest of the world!

Love,

TJ